Grace & Gratitude

"Grace is a divine strength." - Lailah Gifty Akita

Grace, a powerful word, with great depth and meaning. Grace is something we feel internally, like gratitude, they move us in a way that forever changes us. It is almost as if we are forever changed having felt both grace and gratitude. In July's GNR blog, we will explore what grace is, how gratitude complements grace, as well as how it moves us closer to being our authentically divine selves.

Grace can be defined in many ways. Grace is an elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action; a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment; a favor or goodwill; mercy; favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity. When looking at the definition of grace from a theological perspective, grace is defined as the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God; the influence or spirit of God operating in humans to regenerate or strengthen them; a virtue or excellence of divine origin; moral strength; a short prayer said before or after a meal giving thanks; a formal title used in addressing a duke, duchess or archbishop.

When reflecting on the various definitions of grace above, there appears to be a golden thread weaving them all together. Grace is an intentional act which we give or is given to us, helping to alleviate hardship and strengthen us. Grace is recognizing strength, giving gratitude to something greater and being moved by this internally. Grace is something felt.

"Grace doesn't depend on suffering to exist, but where there is suffering you will find grace in the many facets and colors." -William Paul Young, The Shack

Grace is an essence, a deep feeling, similar to gratitude. The relationship between grace and gratitude is quite fascinating. There is a connection between the meaning of these words that links them in a way that, I believe can allow us to feel them more deeply. Gracia, for instance, is Latin for grace and in Spanish, the word gracias is used to thank one another. So the root of gracias, to give thanks to another, comes from the Latin word meaning grace. Pretty amazing when we think about it! I have a truly different appreciation for such a simple word when saying gracias now. It has a deeper meaning for me. Expressing both grace and gratitude with one word. How poetically beautiful this word is now that I know the origin. Grace and gratitude truly complement one another.

"When grace moves in...guilt moves out." -Max Lucado

I love this quote by Max Lucado because it is simple and true. It may be difficult for us to extend grace to ourselves at times, yet we can more often freely give grace to others in times of struggle or hardship. This is a common theme when working with my clients. "How can I begin to show myself grace and compassion as freely as I extend and offer this to others?" I believe we all have that internal critic that sometimes is yelling so loud, it is hard to hear our authentically divine selves. The place where grace lives within each of us is clouded with self-criticism and judgment. That voice of grace is softer, and we often have to slow ourselves down, quiet our minds to hear it. It almost seems as if this is something we move further away from as we grow older. Leaving us to wonder; what is the path back to connecting with our authentic selves? What is the path connecting back to grace?

Having had the opportunity to attend a Yin Yoga and Meditation class a few days ago, the beautifully written, guided meditation experience was called "childhood home." It guided us back to see our childhood self and invited us to experience our lives from the soul of a child. Connecting back to the place of freedom, growth, infinite possibilities, and opportunities. All things that came to mind when engaged in the collective meditation experience. As children, we are, more often than not, born with the innocence and light within; more truly and deeply connected with our authentic selves. Over time and through our lived experiences, sometimes very early on or as we grow, these experiences begin to slowly shadow grace with judgments, as a way to help cope and survive. The inner critic, where guilt, overwhelm and hardships lie, often continues to grow and harden, making it a bit more challenging to slow down and connect with our authentic self. We have to be intentional when trying to connect with that place within where the softer, quieter voice of grace is divinely within. Grace is something that is present at the beginning of our lives, yet also something we tend to move away from as we grow. Yet maybe it is something we circle back to, finding our way back to grace through gratitude as we connect back to seeking and knowing our authentic self.

"I will hold myself to a standard of grace, not perfection." -Unknown

If we are all on a journey of attempting to find our way back to grace, how can we begin to express and extend grace to ourselves as we do for others? I believe that gratitude is one way that can help guide us on this journey. Take a look at some of the tools and suggestions reviewed in the GNR blogs each month. There are some great ways to begin to incorporate gratitude into your daily practices and routines. By beginning to embrace gratitude, you're one step closer to embracing grace!

You may have heard this phrase before in recovery and healing spaces, "progress not perfection." How many times have you heard this in the past, yet learning how challenging this can be to practice. Leaning into grace is one way we begin to embody the idea of progress not perfection. It is often with more ease that we can share this sentiment with another, but to internalize it ourselves can take practice and intention. Remember, grace, by definition, is an action, favor or goodwill, an act of kindness, so to speak. Grace is an intentional act which we give to ourselves or others, helping to alleviate hardship and strengthen us. Grace is recognizing strength, giving thanks for something greater than ourselves and being moved by this internally. In a sense, grace exists because pain and struggle existed first and grace leads us back to our authentically divine selves.

"Whenever life plants you, bloom with grace." -Unknown

You may be familiar with the hymn, Amazing Grace by John Newton. The lyrics are moving and powerful, demonstrating how we are never really alone as God is with us always. The story behind this song isn't one of theology as most may believe, but of Newton's expression of gratitude for the grace which he felt God extended to him to turn is life around into purpose.

"Amazing grace! How sweet the sound That saved a wretch like me! I once was lost, but now am found; Was blind, but now I see.

Through many dangers, toils and snares, I have already come; ’Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far, And grace will lead me home."

Sometimes when we embrace the hardships in our present, they can lead us back to the path of grace and gratitude, leading us back home to our true selves. I like to think of using gratitude to find grace as adding a grace note. A grace note is a musical note added as an ornament. It is a small addition allowing the performer to add expression when playing. A grace note serves as a passing tone on its way to the principle note. While a grace note isn't necessary, it allows for the expression and melody to change and differ, all while adding beauty, depending on the connection and meaning. It seems like a beautiful correlation to grace & gratitude, while both of these are not necessary to live, they add beauty, expression and and deeper meaning in our lives by connecting to them and allowing us to come closer to coming back to our authentically divine selves; the untethered soul we had as children.

So for this month's topic and takeaway, I ask each of you to take a few minutes and create an affirmation or intention for the month of July related to grace and gratitude. Consider asking yourself what this topic brought to mind for you. Are you often too hard on yourself? Is that inner critic speaking loudly recently related to a challenging project at work? Is this a challenging season in parenting or caring for a loved one? Has it been difficult to be generous or gracious to others in your life? Wherever grace and gratitude need a little fine tuning in your life, I invite you to adopt this affirmation or intention for the month to start to embrace a little more grace and gratitude surrounding this. Try to use this affirmation or intention to start or end your day. Maybe even at a time during the day where you hope to embrace grace. A few examples of affirmations or intentions are listed below to help get you started.

• Today, I am extending the same grace I offer others to myself.

• I am grateful for the opportunity today to give myself grace when I need it.

• Today, I recognize the grace present in the challenging moments.

• I embrace myself in this moment and offer gracious thoughts of support.

• I take the time I need to rest and restore.

• I am free, I am patient, and I am radiant light.

How can we feel grace and connect with grace from within? Last month in GNR's Grit & Gratitude blog, I shared how to use the Serenity Prayer as a tool to help practice gratitude and grit. If we come to the present moment, and place meaning behind the words as discussed, this isn't just a grit tool, we also need some grace to truly embody the words meaning. When looking at the Serenity Pray from a place of grace & gratitude, the true wisdom to know the difference comes from that place where grace is, our true authentic selves. The surrender. We need grace for ourselves in that moment to add depth, meaning, and feel graces presence within. A few weeks ago, I had the chance to experience the Serenity Prayer through a short heart breath practice, by Y12SR founder Nikki Myers. Through integrating pranayama techniques with the Serenity Prayer, this is an amazing tool to help guide you to feel grace within. Our breath is one way to help ground ourselves and connect to the present moment. This is a beautiful way to connect with our authentically divine selves through grace. Check out the link above with a short article and video about this heart breath practice.

So if the affirmation or intention resonates with you, or the Serenity Prayer breath, take a few moments to try to incorporate one into your practice this month to help connect to the grace within! And remember, whatever season of life you may be in at this time, there is always a little room for a grace note, to embrace a little grace and gratitude!

Gracias Grateful Beings!

How has Grace & Gratitude moved or motivated you recently? What is the affirmation or intention you are adopting this month to welcome a little more grace & gratitude into your present? Share below in the comments, we would love to hear from you!

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About Grateful Never Relapses

Welcome to a community where the belief and mindset is one in which recovery is possible for everyone! We believe that through gratitude, mindfulness, and awareness of all that is around us and within us, recovery is possible. When you shift your awareness to come from a place of gratitude, even in the most challenging or darkest of times, Grateful NEVER Relapses! The hope for this forum is to offer a brave and safe space to embrace your recovery journey with gratitude. We plan to share useful resources and tools to help you embody gratitude into your daily life. While we understand that everyone's journey is unique to them, we hope you are able to share in the power of gratitude in your own healing journey and realize the doors it may open and the walls it may take down, while recognizing and embracing the power of gratitude within!

By: Laura Anne Pasker, LCPC, LMHC, CCTP, Owner & Clinician at Clarity Counseling Solutions, LLC and Grateful Never Relapses